Dieux de Stade - Making of the French Rugby Calendar 2004
The way these change hands on ebay, you’d think they were the hottest thing on dvd. Well, I guess if you’ve never seen a man undressed, they might be. The guys are very, very pretty, don’t get me wrong. They are all beautifully built (although some of them have that weird bodies-bigger-than-heads effect of over-developed athletes) and some of them are genuinely stunning. But how long can you watch slow motion black and white film of men with all the good parts covered up?
Huh? I hear you cry! This is supposed to be the explicit one – the 2005 one is in colour but much less full frontal. Well, there’s nothing in this one, believe me. Very little full frontal and absolutely no homoerotic overtones. I know homoerotic… I seek it out and bathe in it. It’s just not in this dvd. Which is incredibly disappointing. But then I do recognise that I’m coming to this movie with a comprehensive mainstream gay movie background as well as being a fan of gay porn, so I guess I have a high threshold for homoerotic. But you can see these guys posing together, but there are no looks, there is no rapport between them—I guess as you’d expect from straight men. And they aren’t making a gay calendar. It’s been high jacked by the gay lobby, if you like, but they made the movie as straight men for straight women. Of course, if you believe the theory that one in ten of all men are gay, admitted or not, then at least two of these gorgeous guys are gay.
Still, it wasn’t enough for me speculating on which they were; it just didn’t hold my interest. Maybe it’s a fanfic writer thing: my mission in life is to take straight men from shows and write the gay scenes for them you never see. I’d have my work cut out for me with these guys. Boringly heterosexual. What a waste of those gorgeous, gorgeous bodies.
Wow. This DVD is absolutely amazing. More erotic than many of the pornos we’ve reviewed. I haven’t seen the calendar so I can’t comment on the end product, but take my word for it, this peek-behind-the-scenes at the shoot is so HOT it practically bursts into flames. Actually, I think it must be more fun than the calendar because these boys move. Phew.
An hour and a half of beautiful, mostly naked, men. Unbelievably they’re real rugby players, but not like any I’ve ever seen before. This is the team from your most fevered dreams. A real band of brothers from the classical ideal, male bonding at its best. Some are so goodlooking it takes your breath away.
They pout and pose before the cameras. Solo, pairs, group and team shots. On the pitch, in the locker room, and in and around the tub and showers. It is almost too much to take in one go. It’s all in French without subtitles, but who’s listening to what they’re saying?
The guys are very natural. They’ve got gorgeous bodies and are not ashamed to show them off, no false modesty, so very European. I think it’s great how a bunch of guys, most probably straight, can be so relaxed about posing nude, even some very suggestive shots, with other naked guys. There’s a lovely playful mood. They range in age from callow youth to full-bodied maturity. The male physique in all its glory.
I guess the calendar probably hides their dangly bits, as rugby balls, towels and t-shirts are strategically placed in many poses. However, we get to watch as they’re oiled and buffed, and made up for the camera’s loving gaze. So there’s some full frontal action to feast your eyes on and more pert bums than you can count. One hunk wearing a white t-shirt gets good and wet so the transparent fabric draped over his groin leaves nothing to the imagination. Funny how partially clothed bodies are always more erotic than nudes.
I was jealous of the guys & girls who did make-up on this job. Imagine. All that hard muscled manflesh to dust and shine. All over. Hair to brush and arrange sexily in that come-from-the-bedroom look. Blonds, natural and bleached, brunets. Straight and curly. Short hair, long locks, buzzcuts and shaven heads. Such an array of masculinity there’s bound to be one at least to seriously lust over. Some with sexy tattoos.
A succession of sequences showcase the boys, a few hesitant and shy, others flaunt themselves shamelessly. Candid shots and posed arrangements. This is one of the best DVDs we’ve seen. It delivers everything it promises. And more! I was drooling. Stunning black & white photography makes for a moody, artistic look. A DVD you simply can’t miss. Grab a glass of wine, make yourself comfortable, sit back and enjoy. Oh, just for the record, I believe these boys are pretty decent rugby players too.
As if it matters.