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What Lies Within - 12

There was a small but distinct squeak from the bed. Giles sat up, highly amused. 'Oh! Hypocrite vampire! Not really so keen on everyone knowing then?'

Spike clenched his jaw, sat up too, and lit a cigarette. 'Look, mate. Let's get this straight, 'k? I ask you if you're gonna get all angsty and in-the-closet about this. You're supposed to say, "Dear God, absolutely," or "Good grief! The very thought of admitting to a relationship with you!".' Giles laughed at the near-perfect mimicry of his accent, but Spike placed a hand over his mouth, straddling him as he did so. 'Then…' he added pointedly. 'Then, I was supposed to pout an' whine a little, an' maybe 'ave a long but meaningful silence. You beg. I relent. We have sex and….' Giles removed the hand, still laughing.

'Let's just cut to that part, shall we?'

Spike allowed some kissing… kissing began to lead to other things…. He pulled away with a look. 'So, tell me the worst.'

Giles had the grace to look slightly guilty. 'I asked Willow to do a de-lusting spell….'

'A what? A de-lusting spell? Who the hell would ever want to de-lust? Bloody hell…. Go on.'

'And…. Oh, this is where your watch comes in….'

'Ah… I thought it might be.'

'Yes, well, I took it to represent you in the spell. I honestly, completely forgot that she would recognise it!'

'So…. She realised it were me you were lusting over? Lusting… what a fucking crap word! I'm adding that to me list of words I do not - as a Master Vampire - say.'

'Uh huh. Anyway. I couldn't do it. She said drop it in…. I just clutched it closer and sort of… ran out. So I suspect - two and two together and all that - the whole gang are probably talking about us right now. Very probably trying to picture what it is we are actually doing.'

'Oh, yeah!' Spike suddenly brightened and slid higher onto Giles' lap, twitching up his eyebrow. 'Now, that's a challenge, if ever I heard one!' With a low chuckle, he flung off the bed, dragging Giles with him. He pushed the startled human against the wall and kicked open his legs. 'Let 'em picture this, hey?'

Spike fell to his knees behind Giles, parting the warm cheeks with two strong hands. Giles gasped slightly as a cool tongue lapped gently around his hole, soft lips enclosing it and cool breath teasing upon the wetness. He pushed back, trying to encourage Spike, but the vampire needed no persuasion. He buried his tongue deeply into the warm hole and began to nibble on the edges, driving Giles mad with frustration and with the need to be filled more. 'Do you think they'll picture this?' Spike's voice came huskily from behind as the tongue darted in, probing at the walls, reaching for that elusive spot that would drive the human mad. Giles began to shake his head from side-to-side, utterly incapable of responding: completely absorbed in the sensations. Spike withdrew his tongue and, on the wet trail, slipped a finger in to take its place. It was much stronger, far better for stretching, hooking, scratching, and probing, and he did each in turn until Giles began to moan. 'Bet they do imagine this, watcher, but bet they don't get that moaning just right. Moan some more for me, Giles - just for me, hey? So I can think 'bout it - next time they look at me.'

Giles obeyed. He had little choice: Spike had found the small, soft area that made him swell, that made his penis leak, and his balls ache for relief.

Slowly, Spike pushed to his feet. He kept his finger buried deep and pressed and released, pressed and released in a rhythm that kept Giles at a peak of bliss… but never quite able to tip over and find the relief he needed. Spike put his chin on Giles' shoulder. 'Do ya think they'll imagine us doing this, Giles? Do ya think they even know about this pleasure? Bet they don't….' Suddenly, Giles arched his back in shock. Spike's finger had been replaced by his hard penis so swiftly that the human had had no time to prepare.

At the Giles' jerky spasm of pain, Spike gasped and grabbed his head. Giles' hands flew around and caught at the slim hips, holding the vampire on as the chip fired off so the cool shaft didn't slip out. They rode out Spike's pain together… but only for a short time…. Still gasping, Spike began to thrust. Once more, his cries of pain turned to more intense sounds of pleasure. He became frantic, working Giles hard and fast. Giles couldn't help it; he clenched his teeth and tensed at the unfamiliar pressure in his rectum. Spike jerked even more as his chip fired off again but, with an enormous cry of satisfaction, he unloaded a vast quantity of sperm into Giles, wave after wave of milky fluid filling the human. Giles was stunned, overwhelmed by Spike's pain and his response to it… but then he thought about none of it as he came, shuddering against the wall, cum dripping down to the dark earth, his shaft jerking in his hand, Spike still filling him… until the vampire slid out and fell to his knees, groaning.

Giles turned and put a hand out to Spike. Spike looked up, laughing at his own incapacity and took the offered hand. He was surprised to be pulled into a tight embrace. His face was seized, and Giles glared at him. 'I thought that bloody chip was triggered by intent? If you don't mean to hurt me, it can't go off?'

Spike looked slightly shifty. 'It does. I did wanna….'

'Hurt me?'

'Nah! Well, all right, maybe a bit, but I wanted it to fire off… jeez, Giles, it's SO bloody… fantastic!'

'NO! NO! I utterly forbid you to do that again.'

'Hey! Who the hell are you….'

'Spike, you're not listening. I-forbid-you. Do-you-hear-me? We have absolutely no idea how that chip works; for all you know, it could be causing creeping, irreparable brain damage every time it fires off! You-will-not-do-that-again!'

If there was something in Giles' voice that reminded Spike of someone else a long time ago, he didn't say, but to Giles' surprise, he nodded and said quietly, 'Okay, pet, whatever you say.' Then he added cheekily, 'Bet they didn't picture that, hey?'

Giles rolled his eyes and climbed back on the bed, holding out his hand once more for Spike. Spike took his time, lighting a cigarette and standing provocatively in front of Giles then, with a small laugh, he hopped in beside the frustrated human.

They lay entangled together: damp, sticky, sweaty…. It fell very quiet under the ground. After a while, Giles risked breaking the comfortable silence by saying, 'Do you know, I think I could become very… silly about you: possessive, demanding - even rather embarrassing occasionally.

Spike did not reply for some time; he just lay, draped decorously over the warmer body, not even bothering to move. Eventually, he said conversationally, 'It's me birthday next week. I'm gonna have a party, and I'm gonna introduce you to all me friends. They always like to meet me new fuck-interest: keeps 'em amused.'

Once more, silence reigned until Giles, with a slight preceding cough, said, 'If I promise to stay entirely rational about you at all times, Spike, will you promise never to invite me to one of your parties, or to use that expression again when referring to me?'

Spike kept his smile buried into Giles shoulder, but mumbled amiably, ''K, pet. Fair do's.'

Giles thought Spike had fallen asleep, the vampire became so still and quiet, but he was roused himself from the edge of sleep by Spike's amused voice. 'You can get all demanding in yer head, if you want…. You can be as possessive as you like in private, 'k?'

Giles hugged him a little tighter and pressed his face to the damp, silky hair, emphasising his reply. 'And in bed, maybe?'

Spike laughed. 'No need, pet - you already have all of me there.'

Whatever the gang had expected the next day, they did not expect things to be pretty much as usual. After initial embarrassment when Spike arrived in the shop sometime after lunch, things seemed very… normal. Giles immediately made a cutting comment; Spike took the bait and threw back a caustic reply; Giles countered with a devastatingly accurate slur… but that's when they all realised that things were actually very different indeed. Spike didn't storm out; he didn't get abusive. He stepped up a notch, a new confidence in his manner, and came back with a comment that initially had Giles floored. The human regrouped, made another bitter attack but, this time, Spike just gave him a look, and the look so plainly said, "We'll settle this later, and in a very different way", that Giles was utterly silenced. It was a look between Spike and Giles, but everyone not only saw it - they felt it. A distinct chill of… anticipation ran down spines. Tara and Willow slipped out first. Anya claimed she needed Xander in the basement - for stocktaking. Buffy suddenly felt the need to patrol and seemed determined to ignore the bright sunshine that greeted her exit.

Spike lit a cigarette, the click of his lighter suddenly very loud in the otherwise empty shop. Giles came slowly toward him, but the bell jangled, customers strolling in. He rolled his eyes fractionally and turned to serve them, aware of intense scrutiny from the corner. Giles felt as if Spike stared at him all afternoon. He was sure the vampire must have done something else; he couldn't think he made all that interesting a study, but every time he looked up…? There was Spike… staring at him. He was going to make some comment and, when the shop became mercifully empty for a moment, turned to do just that… but Spike had gone. Giles smiled to the empty seat - Spike's departure only made the anticipation of their next meeting all the more intense.

Buffy returned just as Giles was locking up. He'd been thinking about her, on and off, since she'd left. She was the one he most wanted to approve, but also the one he most feared would not.

He'd even rehearsed lines. He'd gone through every way he could think of to tell her exactly what had happened. He'd played his role; he'd played hers: giving long, slayer-like replies to his devastating points.

As soon as she arrived, he nodded towards the back room. She followed him in and began to stretch off in preparation for some training. He selected some weapons, rolled up his sleeves, picked just the right moment and, with his heart in his mouth, said, 'Buffy…?'

She tried, unsuccessfully, to stifle a giggle.

Giles turned. 'Ah. I see.'

And no more was ever said, or needed.

Xander was Giles' second major worry. The boy had the unfortunate knack of occasionally saying things that were devastatingly wise - albeit not often expressed in words of more than one syllable. Giles did not particularly fancy Xander Harris pointing out that his new clothes were anything but substantial, royal, and very, very nice to look at… but that was the least of his worries. It was Spike he was really worried about. If Xander refrained from riding Giles due to his belief in the watcher's advancing age and approaching senility, he had no restraint with Spike and used him like a verbal punch bag. Although Giles had recently seen a noticeable decrease in the mockery, he feared that this - this strange relationship with him - would only revive it. How much would Spike tolerate? Would he leave him just to escape the ridicule? He worried over this all evening, to the extent that finally, Spike, trying to watch the telly in a bit of peace and quiet, turned it off with an annoyed snap. 'What? Bleedin' what, tosser? If you sigh or clean those bloody glasses one more time, I'll shove them somewhere they really will need cleaning. What the fuck is wrong?'

'It's all right for you, Spike. You've gained in this bizarre relationship. People will look at you and think, "Lucky vampire!" how did he - and you can stop that hysterical laughter and the theatrical rolling around, thank you - I, on the other hand, am sleeping with a vampire - a male one at that. It's not something you drop into conversations… all right… all right…. I'm worried about Xander… and you. I know I shouldn't be - the boy's a complete idiot - but there you are…. That's what's wrong.'

When Spike recovered enough to speak, he just shook his head and patted Giles reassuringly on the leg. 'Already taken care of, luv.'

True to form, Xander decided to make an appearance that night. Spike had gone home so Giles could get some much needed sleep and, within a few minutes of arriving, Xander turned up, jauntily pleased with himself and armed to the teeth with a vast arsenal of jibes to fire at his favourite target. He found the whole situation incomprehensible, yet… oddly… intriguingly understandable.

He fidgeted around for a while, casting Spike small, sideward glances, until he could resist no longer. 'So, Spike, English… err… tea parties and all that, eh?'

'Harris. Remember. Do the nice now.'

Xander gaped. 'Hey! No way and… no fair! That was pre evil-dead-shags-librarian days! No way I'm gonna let this drop; I've got so much new stuff to use on you. Major ragging potential here! I'd never have made that dumb bet if I'd have known you were gonna pull this major life-choice whammy!'

'Uh huh.'

Spike, delighted with himself, sat back and let the boy work it out on his own. Xander looked at Spike's complacent expression; he thought back; he thought forward; he ground the brain cells together and finally said, far more hesitantly, 'No. No way, man. No way am I gonna believe you…. You made that weird bet for this? No. Nuh uh. Refusing to believe…. See this? This is my "I'm not believing evil dead vampire" face here.'

'Now, Harris, that ain't doing the nice, is it? I took you for a lot of things, pet, but never for a welcher.'

Giles was still chuckling over Spike's recitation of this story the next day when he went to open up. Spike had arrived just before dawn, sliding silently into the bed.

If he hadn't set his alarm hours earlier than usual, Giles wouldn't have sensed his arrival at all. As he'd gone to bed that night, he'd thought of Spike's promise to come in quietly and be there when he woke. Again, that sense of missing any time with Spike's pale, cool body annoyed him, so he reset his alarm. When the World Service quietly kicked in just before dawn, Giles lay listening to the so-familiar English voices in a slightly bewildered trance. How many years had he listened to this, desperately trying to motivate himself to get up and face another day of crashing loneliness? How many times had he lain in this empty bed, the smooth, unused side mocking him?

Now, when the radio went off, he woke instantly, listening for the vampire's arrival. His body ached for the company, tingling for the touch of skin upon skin. He made the space alongside him bigger, mocking it now for its complacent smoothness; he'd soon make sure it was rumpled enough.

The mattress depressed; the only sign that he'd arrived. Giles turned, stretched out an arm, and they came together as if their bodies now demanded the touch of the other to be complete. Spike seemed to sense Giles' tiredness and nuzzled in, settling down to sleep, but Giles began to stroke slowly up Spike's spine, trickling a fingernail up to the hairline then back to the base, each descent getting slightly lower, slightly further into the shallow valley where he wanted to be.

Spike chuckled quietly into Giles' chest. 'You'll suffer for this tomorrow and blame me for your grumpiness.'

Giles didn't reply but only moved to kneel between Spike's legs. He parted the pale cheeks, cupping one in each hand, pressing his thumbs over Spike's hole. He leant down and licked around the edge, never quite allowing his tongue to touch the soft, puckered skin. Spike gave a small hiss of anticipation and folded his arms under his head, rocking slightly into the mattress. Suddenly, he felt something ice-cold being dribbled over him and jerked his head up at the unusual sensation. Giles only laughed at his expression. 'Baby lotion.'

Spike rolled his eyes and mumbled some comment about the mighty and fallen, but Giles ignored him and pushed in on the vampire's low complaint. Spike was silenced by the intense sensation, contrasting temperatures making the warm penis' journey exquisitely discernable. Every inch of access was delicious as his cool walls expanded to accommodate that heat. He groaned, and this soft sound was echoed from somewhere behind him.

Giles began to pull out then thrust back in. He looked down, still utterly disbelieving that his early mornings now consisted of making love to Spike. He stretched out a hand and with a firm smack, turned off the World Service.

Spike was so slim, so vulnerable-looking from this position. Giles rode into him with his hands splayed on the thin waist, only emphasising this apparent vulnerability. Almost without making any actual sound, he took a small breath and said, 'I'm so sorry, Spike, for the things I said about you.'

Spike turned his head to one side, evidently hearing even these soft words. Giles blinked slowly, unable to forget those awful days when he'd tried to make this creature seem… just that, a creature, beneath his contempt. 'You know, if I could take them back…. If I could….'

'Giles….' Spike's quiet voice silenced him, and he paused in his slow, even thrusting to listen. 'Say the other things again. Tell me… the rest again.'

Giles blinked very slowly. Forgiveness from a vampire was a rare thing, and he savoured it. He smiled. He knew exactly what Spike wanted to hear. He started moving again and whispered to the rhythm of his thrusts, 'I'll give you the stability you want.' He watched Spike close his eyes slowly, feeling the words as intently as he felt the penetration. 'I'll be the comfort you can't find.' The vampire began to rise slightly to meet Giles' thrusts, and the movement caught the warm balls each time, making them swell and throb. 'You'll wake up next to me and hear my heartbeat. I'll snuggle you and let you share my warmth.' He slid his hands under the slim body and found a hard erection, weeping into the mattress. He played it in his hands, working it for Spike so they could cum together. 'You can walk in my shadow, Spike, and I'll make sure that is your only darkness. I'll be the father you never had.' He cupped Spike's sac with one hand and began to grind the balls together as he knew Spike liked, and still he intoned his promise of love. 'I'll be the friend who'll never desert you. I will interpret your eternity for you, Spike, for the short time I'm here for you. I will try with all my might to save you, Spike - if you want the salvation I offer.' As if illustrating his final promise, Giles filled Spike with a warm rush of fluid and felt a cool one in return running over his hands and seeping into his mattress.

Each orgasm they shared seemed to be more intense than the last one. This one seemed to last longer. There was more cum; he shuddered his sperm into Spike for long minutes of bliss… but finally it had to end. With a last, hissed, 'Spike….' He fell hard onto the supine figure and lay as if his heart would explode in his chest. He knew Spike would only be enjoying the thump, thump, thump through his silent, dead chest, so he lay for a long time until the beat slowed and his breathing returned to normal, dawn began to break over the horizon, the day began to beckon him… yet still he lay on Spike, the damp, blond hair a sweet-smelling pillow.

How he wanted to just sleep now, Spike in his bed and in his arms. He wanted to absorb this still body: somehow make Spike so his that they could never be separated. He chuckled at the image and slid off, ingrained habits of duty and work animating him at last.

Spike, he noted, with a deep, intensely loving smile, was already asleep.

He crept out and left him to his sleep of the dead.

It took Giles a few days, but he eventually noticed that there was something wrong. It was nothing specific, nothing he could actually challenge Spike on. He sensed Spike watching him sometimes… but when he turned? Spike looked away. Spike laughed less - that was very noticeable. When Giles got up to go to work, Spike did not speak, although he suspected that the vampire was awake. When Giles came home, desperate to find Spike still in bed, malleable and needing sex, more often than not he found him dressed and pacing around. When challenged, Spike would only retort, 'You know what it's like; this confinement'll kill me,' and as soon as the last rays of sun left the land, he was off, often not returning until Giles was too deeply asleep to feel him.

Giles came home early one day, just to try and see something of Spike before dark. Spike was sprawled on the couch, watching TV and when Giles began to chatter about his day, he was shushed and the volume turned up.

Slightly shakily, Giles turned away and put the kettle on - the familiar routine alongside these unfamiliar emotions, reassuring. He felt Spike's stare once more, but did not turn to confirm whether this was real or just his over-active imagination. The water boiled, but he did nothing, just leant against the counter, his back tense and his shoulders hunched. At last, able to bear it no longer, he said desperately, 'Don't leave me, Spike.'

The volume went down. 'Huh?'

'Just don't leave me. Please.'

He heard Spike coming closer and felt a hand put over his where it rested on the handle of the kettle. 'What the hell are you talkin' about?'

'You're not happy, are you?' Giles kept his eyes cast down, unwilling to see a lie in Spike's expression, but Spike didn't allow this; he turned Giles to look at him.

'If I'm not, it's cus I don't see 'nough of you. Leave you? Are you fuckin' insane?'

Giles made to speak, but the moment overcame him; he pushed past Spike and went upstairs.

Giving him some space, Spike made the tea and, after a few minutes, carried it up. Giles was standing by the window, watching the sunset. Spike stayed behind in the shadows but put the mug down audibly on the dresser. 'It's the comin' and goin', pet. I hate it. You're always leavin' me, or I'm goin' out an'…. Where we gonna meet? Like you said, I'm dead; you're not, and….' Spike's voice became almost desperate, 'I can't change, can I?'

Giles whirled around: the intense emotions that had driven him upstairs evident in his face. He grabbed Spike's arms. 'Nothing else. Say nothing else; I can't take it in now, Spike. Just tell me again that you're not leaving. Please.'

Spike didn't: he tried to show him instead. He undressed slowly in front of Giles. He let the clothes he'd only just put on fall to the ground, and he lay on the bed he'd spent all day in, willing to forgo the dark and the call of the night to prove that he was very much staying put.

Giles took a long time to cum, anxiety affecting him when he needed it the least, but Spike's skilful touch and relentless effort brought the human to an eventual sweet release. Some of Giles' tension flowed away with the rush of fluid from his body, the rest as he lay in Spike's strong embrace for the blissfully long hours of the night.

The next day, out of synch now, Spike stormed around the house. He debated a foray through the tunnels to the shop but didn't want prurient guessing as to why he was there. Done in by boredom, he almost smashed the telephone when it rang for the fifth time. He snatched it up instead. 'Fuck off! He's not here! He's never fucking here!'



'It's me.'


'Come over.'

'What? I mean, why?'



'Use the tunnels.'


'I want you.'


When he got there, it was almost dark. Giles ignored him for a while, serving customers but, when the sun went down, he turned and said, 'Go outside, and come back in the front door.'

'Yeah, like I'm gonna do that.'


'Oh, for….'

Spike did then flung himself back into his chair, muttering.

Giles rolled his eyes. 'Can you actually read?'

Curious at last, Spike got up and opened the door once more. It still took him a while to see it but, when he did, a slow grin spread over his face. He came back in and sauntered over to Giles. Giles, inordinately pleased with himself, tried not to show it. 'Of course, it has nothing to do with our conversation last night. It's purely a financial move to attempt to alleviate the rather dire state of my finances. All night opening - a night shift, so to speak - seemed the ideal solution….'

Unable to lie and kiss at the same time, Giles' lips and tongue told Spike the real truth: that changing was necessary, and that the human had been the one able - and willing - to change.

That first night, Giles was exhausted; he worked straight through after a full day in the shop… but it was worth it. The sensation of climbing into bed at the same time as Spike in the soft, pre-dawn light was… indescribable. The bed, cool and fresh, swiftly became damp and rumpled. His body, exhausted, became languid under Spike's soft lovemaking, and sleep - when it finally came - was sound, deep, and utterly refreshing, for it was shared with a cool, entwining body.

Spike woke him once or twice during the day and used his warm body gently for relief. Giles couldn't have raised a flag let alone a penis, but he was entranced by the sensation of being used by the vampire. It was a… privilege. He then enjoyed making fun of his own fond foolishness, even though he had been given permission to be as irrational as he wanted in this bed.

At teatime, they got up, showered, ate, talked, messed around for a while, and then walked to the shop. Twenty-four hours spent entirely together and they only wanted more.

Spike stayed for a while, but he needed to work off some excess energy killing something, so he left Giles to his customers and, with a small backward wave of his hand, banged the door closed behind him. The evening was a huge success; Giles was incredibly busy all night. A large proportion of Sunnydale's residents wanted magic supplies apparently but, living on a Hellmouth, couldn't shop for them in the daylight. With suitable spells cast to prevent violence, Giles just stood and took in the money. It delighted him, and he was in a particularly good mood when Spike appeared some time after midnight. He looked up as the bell rang and smiled.

Spike hesitated, but returned the smile with a slightly guilty look and stepped in. He was followed by an odd assortment of demons, carrying beers and snacks. They tipped metaphorical hats to the bewildered watcher - as if they'd been warned to be on their best behaviour - and arranged themselves around the table. Cards were produced and an animated poker game begun.

Spike remained standing, looking at Giles. Giles looked over and gave him an intimate, loving grimace of displeasure, and grinning happily, Spike took his place and opened a beer.

After a few nights of the same, one of the players produced a coffee pot. It became so popular with all the customers that, within a few days, Giles had a small coffee bar installed in one corner. It began to attract night owls wanting a meeting place.

Giles enjoyed having Spike there at night more than he could express. He liked watching him with his friends, loved seeing him in this different environment, interacting with his own kind. One night, Giles sensed Spike staring at him again. He continued to serve some customers, put the money in the till, pottered, and then glanced at Spike surreptitiously through lowered lids. He was right; Spike - the game ignored - was staring at him, oblivious to everything else. Giles openly stared back, and with a tiny, self-deprecating grin, Spike jumped. He went back to the game, ignoring and deflecting the chorus of demon jibes that greeted this odd, un-Spike-like behaviour.

It was a long game, but eventually Spike's friends peeled off, and Giles began to shut up shop. Spike waited for him outside, smoking, and they walked back through town together, the sun a faint glow now on the horizon. Giles waited, debated whether he wanted to know the answer but finally had to ask. 'So, are you going to tell me why you were staring?'

Spike turned to Giles incredulously. 'You've gotta do something 'bout that insecurity of yours, pet. 'S worrying.'

'Ah. I would have thought that, as you had four months watching your own body, you'd have realised why I'm insecure.'

Spike took a while thinking about this, and Giles couldn't resist adding with an amused smirk, 'I rather got the impression that you fancied yourself back then, Spike.'

Spike bristled. 'Remember who's the poof in this relationship, mate.'

Giles walked along, amused and pleased with himself until he suddenly stopped and said, 'Oh! Clever, Spike… but an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to fob me off! I want to know what you were staring at me for. What were you thinking?'

With a sigh, Spike stopped to look in a store and - as if it was of no matter- said, 'I was thinkin' 'bout what I said, you know, 'bout not saying… 'til I meant it like.'

'Ah. And….'

Spike lit a cigarette and carried on walking.

''S nothing, no biggie. I was just thinking that I ought to say it again - now yer listening. I do. Mean it that is.'

Giles jogged to catch him up and held him still by his arm, his voice choked. 'Say it then. I want to hear you say it.'

Spike's jaw dropped. 'I'm not actually gonna say it! I'm a bloody demon, Giles!'

'I don't accept that. Say it. I… need to hear you say it.'

Spike took a long drag, filling himself with much needed nicotine and said out of gritted teeth, 'I love you… but I want it understood that's demon love! I love you like I love blood. Oh! An' killing…! An' violence…! An'….' He continued coming up with suitable, demonic qualifications to his version of love until they reached home. Giles took it all in good part… until the door closed - then he flattened Spike against the wall.

'I want human love from you… now!' Spike was very willing to show Giles the truth of the things that he found so hard to say. They didn't even make it to the bedroom. Spike fell to his knees and took out the warm, hard shaft; the earlier problems now gone, cured by Giles' belief in Spike's need. Giles spread his arms across the counter and leant back to the sensation of Spike's strong mouth and throat working him. He would have come far too quickly but for Spike's strong hand clamping around his root, cutting off and delaying his orgasm. He discovered why; Spike suddenly stood and captured his mouth instead, fumbling with his own zip, releasing an urgent erection. He looked around then pushed Giles onto his belly on the stairs, ripping his trousers down just enough for access. He lay over the warm body; Giles felt something cool but viscous and slightly sticky being rubbed around, and then Spike pushed in. Once cool precum mixed with the blood, it lubricated them both, and the taking became exquisite. The only concession to their earlier conversation that Spike was willing to make was a soft murmured, 'I do mean it,' just before - with a grunt - he shuddered against Giles' backside, depositing a thick stream of cum deep into the warm body.

Almost before Giles could think about what was happening, Spike was out; he was flipped around and his orgasm neatly captured in a cool, willing mouth.

They slid to the floor, clothes around their thighs, glistening shafts still out and fluid leaking into small, opaque pools on the cold stone.

Giles had never realised how restless Spike was during the day: how little he actually slept. He did not remember being like this when he occupied that slim body but assumed that, being used to the preternatural state, Spike controlled it better, and it did not tire him so.

Giles often woke to find Spike sitting up along side him, smoking. Sometimes he wasn't there at all, but the sound of television drifted up from below. One particularly restless morning, Giles - patience gone - finally slapped at Spike's twisting, wriggling body and said in a slightly sharp tone, 'Get a bloody book or something, will you Spike? I shall kick you out in a minute.'

Muttering, Spike pulled on his jeans and stomped out of the room. Giles lay in the blissful peace… missing him more than he cared to admit. It was suddenly very quiet. Giles tried to ignore the creeping fears that plagued him. With the paralysing panic that only someone who has something to lose can know, he began to imagine life without Spike. What if the vampire - in his anger at being ousted from the bed - had missed a beam of sunlight, going up in a burst of silent flame? What if someone had been waiting for him and he was….

Giles pulled on some old sweat pants and went swiftly down the stairs. Spike was standing by the bookcase, looking at a book in his hand, flicking the pages, a frown on his face. Giles came up behind him, warping his arms around the slim, cool torso; his previous anxiety only making the first touch with Spike's skin even sweeter.

'Why so long?'

'You already had this one.'

'What?' Giles frowned, too, and took it from Spike. 'Ah. No.' He smiled at the precious copy of Whitman. 'Actually, I rescued it from the bin. I…. It was my birthday, after all; I'm allowed to be fickle.'

Spike laughed and wrapped his arms over Giles'. 'Poof. So, why'd'ya file it in 'L' then? Amuse me.'

Giles began to nibble into Spike's neck slightly, just as he knew the vampire liked - just as he knew would turn him on. 'Because when I decided to keep it, I wanted it to remind me of something a very wise person once told me.'

'Don't think I'm gonna like this, but I'm gonna ask anyway…. What did this tosser say, tosser?'

Giles bit quite hard, swelled and rose to the slight gasp of arousal from Spike, and said very softly into the bite, 'Love is just love… wherever you find it.'


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